Ask Sharon: Cherish time spent with your child

Ask Sharon

Cherish time spent with your child

LAST week I considered the true meaning of Mother’s Day and specifically what anyone in a mum’s inner circle can do to support them.

This week it’s about what mothers can do for themselves to make their busy, demanding lives more enjoyable and fulfilling.

I’m not a fan of hypocrisy so it’s critical that anything I write is not only true to my heart but also my experience. This week was no different, and being a mother myself I wanted to present practical pathways to peace that I had tried, tested and would leave a mum feeling triumphant in just about any situation. A big ask, I know!

My quest seemed divinely inspired when I discovered words from the OSHO Zen Tarot card, Totality. It illuminates what mothers can aspire to in order to enjoy the rewarding yet relentless nature of motherhood.

“Developing the knack of being total in responding to whatever comes, as it comes, is one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself. Taking one step through life at a time, giving each step your complete attention and energy, can bring a wondrous new vitality and creativity to all that you do.”

Sure, it can be a challenge to appreciate the delight, wonder and joy that comes from motherhood, amidst stress, sleep deprivation and squabbles.

So much of what mothers do involves being pulled in different directions – multi-tasking becomes the norm. Yet, what attentiveness does is encourage us to be fully present in the moment. That means being present for the highs (affection, laughter, fun), the lows (tantrums, demands, fatigue) and even the mundane in between.

Tips on how to balance being you and being mum:

• Stop trying to control every detail (this has been a biggy for me) – allowing others to be themselves and giving situations the space to unfold, works out better every time.
• Drop comparing yourself to other mums – each to their own journey.
• Release the idea of how you think things ‘should’ be – make acceptance your new best friend.
• Apply the aeroplane oxygen mask concept to self-care – in order to take care of others you must first take care of yourself.
• If all else fails, look into your child’s eyes.

Last week, I attended a moving Mother’s Day service at my son’s school, and the words, “Motherhood is a gift” made me stop and think. I considered all the women who are unable to have children, all the mothers who are ill or no longer with us, and closer to home, the mummy friends I have lost. It dawned on me that despite the challenges, I have been blessed with a gift…time to cherish it.

Send your questions for Sharon to editor@areanews.com.au

The quote from the “Totality” card in the OSHO Zen Tarot card deck is copyright to OSHO International Foundation Switzerland (1994). The “Totality” card has been illustrated by Deva Padma (Susan Morgan).

A timely reminder:

Usually, I prefer to post my column from The Area News on the same day as it’s published. Yesterday, however, my son was sick and everything was put on hold to take care of him. It’s what parents do. Suddenly, cherishing the time spent with him was all that mattered. Conscious parenting means walking the talk…always.

For anyone taking care of sick kids, one of my previous posts on this subject might bring some comfort and relief.